“Don’t,” she said, raising a halting hand as he reached into his pocket.
“I’m not going for my wallet,” he reassured her. It gnawed at him that she thought for a second he ever would with her. “At least…I’m not reaching for money.”
She slowly withdrew her hand, but still scrutinized him with her black, swollen eyes. Her examination made him nervous, and he fumbled to open it. A woman at his church had been posting a flier on the bulletin board last month, and given him a card when he’d asked for one. He’d kept it secure until Candi arrived, knowing she’d be back eventually.
“What’s this?” she asked when he handed her the card.
“It’s the number for a battered woman’s shelter,” Dr. Addams said. “They hold no judgment. Just say my name and they’ll take you in. They might not have a bed for you right away, but they promised they’d keep you comfortable until they do.”
“I don’t…I can’t do that,” she stammered.
“Why not?”
“Daddy would never let me!”
He could feel his face growing hot by the second. He wasn’t a violent man, but he felt an explosion coming. What threatened to bring it on wasn’t how quickly she dismissed the assistance. She blurted out her profession of love like it was the most obvious fact in the world. but was willingly turning a blind eye on what was the most obvious thing in the world to him.
“Because he loves you?” he challenged.
“That’s right,” she insisted.
Addams could see she was still holding to the lie she told herself. That Reginald, or whatever his name was loved and cared for her the same way she did for him. And she’d keep on believing that lie, even if it put her in an early grave. The only way to stop this, the only way to save her, Addams realized, was to do what Reginald and that monster were doing to her.
He’d have to hurt her.
He might not use his fists, or string her along emotionally, but Addams believed he’d hurt her worse than the other men in her life ever did. Because he wasn’t slapping her around, or stringing her along. He was forcing her to see her life as the shambles it really was.
“Do you really believe, deep down, that that’s true?”
Her eyes widened from the shock of being asked such a brash question. She made to rise from the exam table, but he shifted his weight to give up the impression he was barring her from leaving. His stomach turned itself inside out, but he stood his ground. He’d hate himself forever, but this was what she responded to, and if it saved her life, he was up to the task.
Addams forced himself to meet her gaze until her silence had gone on long enough to be considered a surrender.
“You need to start thinking about yourself. Because he won’t. What do you think’s going to happen to you when you’re not his top earner anymore? When you can’t earn your keep? You think that animal Congressman is going to take care of you? Give you a place to call your own? Provide for you?”
He snorted. “He’s too busy gearing up to run for President.”
She snuck a quick glance at the card in his outstretched hand, then gave it a long study with her one good eye. He held his breath, praying she’d see it as the life preserver it was, and that she’d take it.
“It’d just be worse for me when I go back,” she sighed. “Daddy will pull my best Johns from me.”
“Good!” he exclaimed. “That means you’ll be done—”
“Except ‘the animal’ as you call him,” she said gravely. “He’ll be my punishment.” Her voice plummeted several octaves. “And he’ll have a lot of pent up frustration if I make him wait to be with me again.”
Dr. Addams opened his mouth, and swiftly clamped it shut, understanding the predicament she was in. The number on that card could save her life, but only if she committed to it. There could be no backslide. The two men in her life would sadistically use her up until they killed her. He started to lower his arm with the card and stopped himself.
Don’t stop now!
Her good eye shot from the card to him, then back to the card. He didn’t care how tired his arm was getting, he’d hold it up forever until she took it. She had to. Her eye met his again, and although they didn’t speak a word, as they stood there, with the other reflected in their eyes, their gaze did all the speaking for them.
I can’t take that.
It’s your ticket to freedom.
Daddy will kill me if he finds it on me.
Not if you’ve already arranged to leave.
I’ll throw it into the first trashcan I see.
No. You won’t.
How’re you so sure?
Because that’ll be an admission you’ll never escape this hell.
Why are you doing this? You don’t even know my real name.
It doesn’t matter to me.
But why are you so nice to me?
For the same reason you always know I won’t turn you away after what that animal has done to you.
But why?
You know why.
Her good eye slowly dropped to the card. Addams felt like he held it for another eternity, but still refused to lower his arm, no matter how much it was cramping. He nearly exhaled a deep sigh when she finally took it and stuffed it in her purse.
She eased past him, hobbling toward the door. He turned to watch her go. When she opened the door, she stopped to turn back to him. Something was clearly on the tip of her tongue, but she opted to swallow it.
Everything that had been needed to said had already been said. Now it never need to be spoken aloud.